My Default

It is 3:00 am and I have been awake since 2:15 am. I woke up and couldn't go back to sleep. So naturally, my mind starts wondering. I guess the right term would be..worrying. I immediately "default" to all that I need to do "when I wake up". Here are some things that were going through my mind.

1. Did I pay the truck payment?
2. I need to finish shopping.
3. Are the kids ok? Did I hear someone call me and didn't realize it?
4. Why is Jeff always on my side?
5. What do I have for Will to eat in the morning?
6. How will we pay all these bills?
7. How will we send Kori to college?
8. Do I hear someone downstairs?
9. Should I get up?
10. Then... the last thing I thought was.... Is God waking me up because He wants to say something to me?

So... I got up. I came down to my desk and started searching for what He may be trying to say. I came across several good things in a few devotions I have, but the word He had for me was found in my Breaking Free, Day by Day devotion book (given to me by my good friend Rhonda).

The scripture reference is Romans 8:6 "The mind-set of the flesh is death, but the mind-set of the spirit is life and peace". The first thing Beth Moore says in the devotion is " When we do not make the deliberate choice to think according to the Spirit, we "default" to the flesh. You've noticed we never have to wake up in the morning and choose to be self-centered. We default into self-centeredness automatically unless we deliberately submit to the authority of Christ and the fullness of His free Spirit". She goes on to say " When we think according to the flesh, we are often anxious, unnerved, insecure and fearful, not to mention greedy, lustful, jealous, and all sorts of things we were never meant to be as Christians".

Boy....did she peg me this morning. I woke up and my flesh immediately took over. I have to learn to submit to the Spirit first thing when I wake up. Before I default to the flesh.

Well... I am going back to bed now. First I am going to pray some more, then hopefully enjoy a few more hours of peaceful sleep. Sweet dreams.